Cat People

I'm a cat person. My husband is a cat person. My kids are cat people. I've had cats for the past 20 years.

Clay and I aren't dog people. Only because we have never had one, even as kids. But we've talked about getting a dog for years. At one point we wanted a rescue Pug and would have named it Sluggo. Then we looked at rescue Greyhounds. We seriously considered it until we found out that they like to chase small furry things and decided that for Nemo the Cat's sake, we would pass on the Greyhound. Don't want to risk any of those nine lives. Ultimately we decided that if we ever got a dog, it would be a Standard Poodle. A Poodle DOG, not a puppy. Black, preferably. Just not a puppy.

Two weeks ago we got a Standard Poodle. A puppy. We discovered that it's very difficult to find a Standard Poodle Rescue Dog or other adult Poodle. A friend's neighbor had bred his Poodle and had an extra pup. She is a Parti Poodle, which means she's two colors--white body with large black spots and a black mask. Very cute. We went to check her out and, well, you can guess the rest.

Clay and I aren't dog people. But we're learning to be.

Cancer Humor

Do you have a friend who's going through chemo and could use a little humor? I've added new water bottles to my webstore to replace the earlier one I had. These bottles are very cool looking. They have a picture of a woman getting a chemo I.V., saying to the nurse, "Can you add some tequila to that?" and come in hot pink, teal or kiwi green. The previous water bottle is half price, too. Check them out!

I just want to ride the bus!

I feel bad for my son a lot of times. He doesn't get to do so many things that other kids take for granted, just because he has autism. He wants to ride his bike around the block by himself, like his sister and the other kids do. But I can't trust that he won't ride out into the street or take off somewhere else and get lost, so he can only go around the block if I go with him.

He wants to play out in the front yard by himself, without me going out with him. But I can't let him. "I promise I won't go in the street, Mommy" will only last until he sees something in the neighbor's yard and zips across the street without looking. Even when I AM outside with him we have had several close calls with cars. Not so easy to keep up with a kid speeding around on his scooter, even though he stays on the sidewalk. Coming to a corner? No big deal, he'll just keep going right into the street. I used to be able to keep up with Ian on foot. Now I have to patrol the street on my bike because he is so fast and I'm....um...not.

More than anything the poor kid just wants to ride the bus to school. We have to drive him to school every day because he goes to a charter school for kids with autism and our home district won't transport him. OTHER districts bus their kids to this school but our district won't. Something about the fact that we are CHOOSING not to use our district's school so they won't transport him anywhere else. If he went to one of our local schools the bus would pick him up. I love our school district but they can't come close to giving him the services that his special school does. So our son gets "punished" because we are choosing to give him the best possible education we can find for him. Don't even get me started. But every day he sees his friends arrive by bus and wants to know why he can't take the bus. Really, don't get me started.

The guy who used to live next door to us drives us a bus for our district and used to drive it down our street all the time. Unfortunately, he moved right before Ian's desire to ride a bus began. I wish he were still here so I could beg him to give my kid a ride on the school bus. Is that so much to ask?

How to Help a Friend with Cancer

When someone is diagnosed with cancer, her friends often don't know what to do or say. I can't speak for every cancer patient because every diagnosis and every personality is different. But these are some possible ways that you can help your friend if you find out she has cancer.

1. Don't say, "Call me if you need anything" because she probably won't. Either she won't want to impose, isn't comfortable asking for help, or won't remember who offered. "What do you need help with right now?" might work better.

2. Offer specific help: "I'm bringing you dinner--which day is best?"

3. If she has kids, offer to take them on a specific day, like when she has chemo. The day of and the few days after chemo can be really rough physically and emotionally. It can give your friend and her husband a chance to re-group.

4. Chip in with others and pay for a cleaning service for her house.

5. Send her a card with a personal message from you, not just a pre-written verse. Even if you don't know what to say, then just say that in the card. It IS the thought that counts with the card, not just the message.

6. Send her a card or call every time she has a chemo treatment. Even if she's had several treatments, it never becomes easier.

7. Cancer treatment is a long process, taking months, even years, to go through. Let her know that you're thinking about her the whole time she's going through it. Whereas the treatment may seem routine after awhile and the shock of it is over for you, for your friend it never becomes routine and is draining emotionally.

8. Offer your support but don't push it or make her talk to you about her cancer. Often she may just want to have a "normal" conversation.

9. Help her laugh! Go to a comedy club, watch a funny movie. Laughing will help her forget for awhile what she's going through.

10. When her treatment is over, don't think that everything will just go back to normal for your friend and she no longer needs support. Her life will be permanently changed and she might still need your support.

Double Mastectomy

I came across an interesting article today in Science Daily. It said that increasingly women are choosing to have a double mastectomy even when they are diagnosed with early stage breast cancer that could be treated with a lumpectomy and radiation or hormone treatment (up 188% from 1998 to 2005). I think I can understand this one. My mastectomy was not optional, but I didn't have to have a double. I chose to anyway. As I told my breast surgeon, "I don't want to be sitting here 10 years from now having this same conversation about cancer in my other breast." I know a double mastectomy doesn't eliminate the chance of recurrence 100%, but it does help a little bit with peace of mind.

Freckle Books (tm)

I've mentioned before that my son, Ian, has autism. It's so hard to explain to other kids why he is different from them. It's not like he is different physically, like in a wheelchair or blind or deaf, which is pretty easy for another kid to understand. It was the same thing with our daughter. When Jodi was 4 and Ian was 2, she was starting to question why her brother wasn't like all the other little brothers that she saw. We were lucky to find a simple book written for kids that explained what autism was--it made it a lot easier for her to understand why her brother was different.

Freckle Books is a new company that I just heard about. They have a line of books targeted for teachers and group leaders who want to help the children in their class or group understand the disability of a special needs peer. Their first book is called, "My Name is Jacob. I have Down Syndrome". They also have books for autism, ODD and ADD. It's a great way to help the typical kiddos understand the needs of their friend who is different from them.

2 dogs design

Hey, check this out. If you're looking for a way to increase hits to your website, read what Jill is doing at 2dogsdesign. She is doing search engine optimization on a client's website and is going to do it publicly so everyone can follow along and see what she does. Click this link to see what's going on. I'm looking forward to learning a lot from her!